Mind reading occurs when we place onto others what we think they are thinking or feeling. Without their telling us, we believe we know what people are feeling and why they are acting the way they do. Mind reading relies upon a process called projection. Mind readers jump to conclusions that are true for themselves […]
The Importance of Being Detached
At times we may find ourselves repeatedly talking about our adult children’s problems with friends or our partner. We may spend excessive amounts of time and energy worrying about and trying to solve someone else’s problems or may even be trying to change others. In relationships, we may feel the need to please or do […]
Setting Our Boundaries
Learning to establish boundaries is vital for personal growth and well-being. In order to achieve this, we must learn to identify our rights and needs and then become skilled at assertively taking care that these needs are respected. This process allows our true selves (our wants, needs, desires, thoughts, values and feelings) to emerge. Healthy […]
Boundaries – our emotional fences
Boundaries define how we interact with others and how we allow others to interact with us. Psychoanalyst and philosopher Jacques Lacan stated that boundaries define us as individuals, outline our likes and dislikes, and set the distances we allow others to approach us. They include physical, mental, psychological and spiritual boundaries. We learn how to set […]
The Value of Pets in Our Lives
More than 50% of Canadian households own pets of some kind. The domestication of animals is not a new trend as evidence suggests that the domestication of dogs occurred at least 12,000 years ago and cats around 9000 years ago. What is the lure to share our living quarters with a pet? People often say […]
Codependency
Henry Thoreau stated, “There is nothing so rare as an act of your own.” However, why would acting upon one’s own thoughts and feelings be so rare or difficult to do? According to John Bradshaw, “co-dependency is the most common family illness.” Co-dependence is a set of maladaptive, compulsive behaviors learned by a person in […]
