Although most of us take genuine pleasure in completing a job to some standard of achievement, perfectionists are driven for excellence every time. Perfectionists do not allow themselves to make mistakes and are often on the alert for imperfections and weaknesses in themselves and others. Perfectionists often view situations with black-and-white thinking; outcomes are good […]
Transitioning Life’s Losses
Psychoanalyst David Peretz stated, “Loss is an integral part of human existence, a fact which has profound consequences from birth to death.” However, what exactly are these consequences? Losses are usually accompanied by a sense of grief, a feeling many people are uncomfortable with. We may feel out of sorts, confused, restless, depressed, angry and […]
Setting Our Boundaries
Learning to establish boundaries is vital for personal growth and well-being. In order to achieve this, we must learn to identify our rights and needs and then become skilled at assertively taking care that these needs are respected. This process allows our true selves (our wants, needs, desires, thoughts, values and feelings) to emerge. Healthy […]
Boundaries – our emotional fences
Boundaries define how we interact with others and how we allow others to interact with us. Psychoanalyst and philosopher Jacques Lacan stated that boundaries define us as individuals, outline our likes and dislikes, and set the distances we allow others to approach us. They include physical, mental, psychological and spiritual boundaries. We learn how to set […]
The Necessity of Suffering
The Buddhist’s First Noble Truth necessary on the path to liberation is that ‘Life is suffering.’ Similarly, philosopher Martin Heidegger stated, “The soul’s greatness takes its measure from its capacity to … be … at home in pain.” According to therapist Alfried Langle we suffer for many reasons. He suggested that all possible forms of […]
Our Inner Masculine & Feminine Energy
All people contain both masculine and feminine qualities. Masculine traits include planning, order, accomplishments, competition and linear thinking. Feminine qualities include spontaneity, non-competiveness, intuition and looking relationally at situations. As children we learned, mostly by our parents, to act, believe and feel based upon the values given to feminine and masculine qualities. We were taught […]
